


Mouthful

by ladyxdaydream



Category: Naruto
Genre: All the banter, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Banter, Flirting, Getting Together, Humor, M/M, Modern AU, One Shot, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:28:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23188513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyxdaydream/pseuds/ladyxdaydream
Summary: Iruka reluctantly agrees to join Anko on her date with every intention of blending into the background....He might as well have had a spotlight on him.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka
Comments: 30
Kudos: 237
Collections: Iruka's Birthday Shiritori 2020





	Mouthful

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [A Damn Good Teacher](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23079574) by [Gloomier](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloomier/pseuds/Gloomier). 



> This has way too much development for a one shot, but you should expect that from me by now lmao 
> 
> ┑(￣▽￣)┍
> 
> As the second half of Iruka (S)ass Squad, I present to you the next fic in mine and Gloomier’s shiritori stint. 
> 
> Enjoy!

“ _Potential, he has?”_ Anko croaked, doing her best Yoda impression while she held out her phone for Iruka to examine.

Iruka pushed his sunglasses to the top of his head, giving Anko a thoroughly unimpressed look.

“ _That,_ ” he said, pointing at her. “That  _right there_ is why you don’t have a boyfriend.”

Anko dipped her fingers in the pool and flicked water at Iruka’s face.

“That, right there, is why  _you_ don’t have a boyfriend, jackass,” Anko said, echoing his words back to him. “Quit being a dick. Just look at him will ya?”

Iruka leaned forward to squint at the screen before replacing his shades. He fell back against his tube with a shrug.

“ _So_?”  Anko pressed. “Potential, right?”

“I guess,” Iruka said, twirling the plastic umbrella around in his drink.

“You guess?”

Anko turned the phone back to herself to examine it again.

“You can’t see his face, Anko.”

“Because it’s pushed into the fur of his dog!” she swooned. “I think it’s cute.”

“Since when? You’re a cat person.”

“And you’re a buzzkill.”

Iruka rolled his eyes beneath his shades.

“I suggested we meet tonight. Come with me.”

“Why would I do that?” Iruka asked, taking a sip of the margarita he and Anko had concocted from some sketchy, ready-made mix in the back of the cabinet. “If you want to ignore how incompatible you are, that’s your problem, not mine.”

“Okay  but what if he’s weird? Or creepy? Or stands me up? _Pleeeease.”_

She pressed her hands together in prayer.

“Fine,” Iruka sighed, swatting a bee away from his glass. It’s not like he had anything better to do—the new episode of _The Bachelor_ could wait. Besides, this night could prove to be just as chaotic, and Iruka never could resist the promise of good drama.

“Hooray!” Anko said, putting her phone in the cupholder of her inflatable pool chair. “What should I wear?”

“You’re not going to wear jean shorts, fishnets, some nerdy graphic tee, and a leather jacket? _Shocking_.”

“ _ You _ —” Anko grabbed onto Iruka’s tube “— _little shit,_ ” she huffed, trying to flip him. Iruka outmaneuvered her easily, causing her to tip over with a squawk instead.

She emerged from the water looking like a drowned rat, her purple hair plastered to her face. Iruka just sipped his drink while she coughed, his tube bobbing lazily from the small waves she created in her wake.

“My  _phone!”_ Anko shrieked, after she’d pushed her bangs out of her eyes and got a good look at it on the pool floor. 

She dived down to grab it.

“I told you not to bring it in here,” Iruka said when she resurfaced. 

“I’m going to replace your precious tanning oil with something that’ll make you burn next time.”

“Does that even exist?”

Anko came towards him threateningly. 

“Okay, okay.” Iruka flinched away, knowing when he was at a disadvantage. He held his drink above his head. “If this spills in the pool, Asuma will never let us use it when he’s out of town again.” 

“What is with you today? God, you’re so insensitive,” Anko said, turning away from him to stare forlornly at her drenched phone on the ledge of the pool.

Iruka wrinkled his nose at being called out; he  was being kind of a dick. It wasn’t her fault that he’d had the week from hell. Why was it so easy to jab at the ones we love?

He slid out of his tube and waded over to her.

“I’m sorry, alright,” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. “I’m sure Asuma’s got a bag of rice inside. Let’s go check.” 

“A bag of rice?” she asked, incredulous. “Seriously, Ru?”

“Don’t knock the magic, Anko,” Iruka said, lifting himself out of the pool. “Watch. In 24 hours, you’ll be on your phone again.” 

Anko got out of the pool too, drying herself off alongside Iruka.

“I don’t  _have_ 24 hours,” she whined. “Now I have no way to contact DogDaddy about our meet up tonight.”

Iruka stopped wiping his chest.

“…dog daddy?” he repeated, bringing the towel up to his mouth to barely suppress his laugh.

“Shut up,” Anko said, her pout threatening to turn into a smile. “I don’t know his real name yet, okay?” 

Iruka brought the towel to his hair, giving it a good ruffle, before draping it around his shoulders.

“Use my phone.”

“What?”

“Download whatever dating app you were using to my phone, and contact him,” he offered. “I’m going with you, right? We can just share it.”

Anko wrapped her arms around Iruka’s damp torso, placing a loud kiss to his pec.

* * *

They were sitting at the bar, side by side, with Iruka’s phone resting between them on the smooth wood. Anko was chewing on her nail nervously while Iruka scanned the crowd for the hell of it. A tattooed man playing darts caught his eye, but then he flexed his muscles at his friends when he hit a bullseye, letting out a loud roar.

Iruka turned back to nursing his drink.

_ Eugh. _ Too straight.

Just then, a new message popped up on his screen. Anko lunged for the phone and read it.

“Okay, he’s on his way in. Go.  _Go_ ,” she said, shoving him hard on the shoulder.

“I’m going, I’m going,” Iruka laughed, pocketing his phone with one hand and grabbing his drink with the other. “Good luck,” he winked.

Anko frantically waved him away.

Iruka rolled his eyes, taking a sip from his drink. He chewed on the small red straw as he winded his way through the bar to find somewhere he could watch from a distance.

He found a tall standing table in the corner that was unoccupied. He set his drink down, and turned around to examine his position. Anko’s date was just arriving and… _oh_.

Oh, damn.

He was hot as hell.

Iruka suddenly wished he had put more effort into his outfit, but then squashed the thought. He was here for _Anko,_ not himself. That didn’t stop him from checking himself out in the wall of mirrors behind him though. 

Iruka looked at the man again. He couldn’t help himself. His hair seemed whiter in person. Iruka thought he had maybe dyed it silver—since that was a  _thing_ now—by the terrible lighting of his profile picture. But here, in person, it looked… natural. 

And then there was his face. It was sharp, and angular. The cut of his jaw was almost enough to make Iruka’s knees buckle—he was a _sucker_ for a good jawline. Iruka’s eyes explored his mouth next and stayed there for a moment, distracted by the movement of his lips as he spoke. He must have been staring a little too long because when he flicked his eyes back up, the man was staring directly at him.

Iruka stared back in shock. The other man titled his head slightly, an obvious sign of acknowledgement.

Iruka burned with embarrassment.

Before Anko could turn around and notice him, he shifted an inch to the right, putting a body between their line of sight.

A few moments later, the body left, exposing him completely. Iruka glanced up at the same time as Anko’s date, causing them to meet eyes again.

Shit. Shit shit shit.

He pulled out his phone for something to distract him. When he unlocked it, he found the dating app’s messenger still open. Iruka bit his lip, trying to resist the temptation.

Fuck it—he clicked on the link to the man’s profile.

_ Age: 31. _

A few years older than he was. Nice.

…Not that he was looking for himself!

He took a sip of his drink and continued to read.

_ Likes: Long walks on the beach. _

Iruka snorted, causing the ice in his drink to clink against the glass.

_ Cuddling by a fireplace. Stargazing. Picnics. _

God, this guy was really laying it on thick. What an idiot.

A  _hot_ idiot, Iruka reminded himself, his attention moving to his avatar. He clicked on the stranger’s photos, but was sadly disappointed. There were only two—the one Anko had already showed him, and another that was solely of his dog. It was wearing a costume with a caption that read:  _happy howl-o-ween!_

Iruka leaned more heavily on the table, pressing a smile into his bicep.

Okay, that was cute. Dumb, but cute.

He went back to browsing his profile again—they had similar tastes in music; books, not so much.

_Occupation … _

Oh. A high school teacher.

That appealed to Iruka, considering he taught at the elementary level.

He lifted his eyes from the screen, daring to check him out again. He was safe, for a second, before the man eyed him from over his drink while he took a sip. Iruka’s heart dropped into his stomach, and then proceeded to fall to his feet because  _the man was getting up._

_Fuck_. 

Iruka glued his eyes to his phone, clicking over to instagram for something else to stare at, hoping to god he wasn’t being approached.

“There you are,” came Anko’s voice, startling him.

“Hah, yeah,” Iruka replied nervously, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Here I am.”

Anko scrutinized the blush on his cheeks.

“Are you looking at porn on twitter again?”

“What?!  _No_.  That was one time! And it was an accident!”

“Whatever you say,” she replied, unconvinced. “Come on. He’s in the bathroom. Let’s bail before he comes back,” she said, tugging on his elbow.

“Not going well?” Iruka asked as nonchalantly as he could.

“The asshole keeps staring at someone else,” Anko said. “But I can’t figure out who for the life of me.”

“Oh, uh, that’s terrible. Fuck him!” Iruka said with as much fake gusto as he could manage. He took another sip of his drink to hide his face. 

“ _Meh_ ,” Anko shrugged. “We weren’t hitting it off anyway. You were right. He’s not my type. Let’s go to Ko’s. ” 

She tugged on him again, but Iruka stood his ground.

“I think I’m going to finish my drink,” he said, holding it up. “I’ll join you in bit.”

Anko eyed him suspiciously, an then swept the room with a glance, clearly wanting to book it before her failed date returned from the restroom.

“Suit yourself. See you soon.”

She left at that. Iruka wasn’t worried about her. She could take care of herself. Besides, Kotetsu’s apartment was barely two blocks from the bar.

He quickly observed himself in the mirror, smoothing a few stray hairs back, before thinking _screw it,_ and letting his hair down completely. He was just tucking it behind his ear when the silver-haired man appeared behind him in the mirror, meeting his eyes in the reflection.

“Hey.”

Iruka spun around.

“Hi,” he said, praying it didn’t sound as breathless as it felt.

“Are you here alone?”

“Yes,” Iruka replied, finding it hilarious that the only reason they were both alone was because Anko had just left. “Are you?” he asked, despite knowing the answer.

“Not anymore.”

Iruka laughed at how lame that was. If he wanted to play, Iruka would play, too. He was an expert at appearing hard to get. Though it was partly true—he was notoriously picky. 

“You do know this is a straight bar, right?” Iruka teased.

“And yet neither of us are straight,” the stranger answered easily. 

Iruka absorbed that information along with the finer details of his face; particularly that sexy mole sitting an inch from his mouth.

“That’s a bold assumption,” Iruka said, dragging his eyes to the scar.

“I assume everyone’s gay until proven otherwise.”

Iruka stopped the smile that was straining to form. 

“And how’s that working out for you?” Iruka asked, crushing the ice around in his drink with his straw.

“I don’t know. You tell me,” the man replied, his voice laced with a smooth intensity. 

It made Iruka’s skin prickle. 

“Hard to say. I’m a little bored,” Iruka lied, flipping his hair over his shoulder to dramatize his point. “Your opening line was pretty weak.”

The man’s mouth hinted at a smirk. He took a swig of the beer he was holding. 

“And you’re pretty rude for someone who was making eyes at me,” he said, pointing the bottle at Iruka. “Unless you’re just a flirt.”

Iruka gaped at him, his body heating up at the retort. The man had a bit of a bite, and it turned Iruka on more than he cared to admit.

“You were staring, too,” Iruka said. “It was hard not to notice.”

That got a laugh out of him.

“I’ll admit to that,” the man said, taking a step towards him. “Will you tell me your name?”

“…Iruka.”

“Iruka,” the man repeated, testing how it sounded.

And damn it sounded good. Iruka was already imagining what it would sound like breathed against his ear.

“Kakashi,” the man supplied before Iruka could ask.

They eyed each other in silence, a new tension forming in the absence of words. Iruka saw Kakashi’s eyes sweep across the scar adorning his own face. It felt intimate. Too intimate.

“So,  _Kakashi_.”  Iruka said, unable to stand still any longer. “We both like what we see. Now what?” 

He wasn’t usually this forward, but he was feeling it tonight. All of this playful banter was riling him up—it was his favorite way to flirt.

“I like a man whose direct,” Kakashi said, shifting his stance to lean an elbow on the table. “But hmm,” he hummed. “I don’t know.”

He gave Iruka a seemingly bored look, as if the obvious invitation to leave together was lost on him.

“Well, I like a man whose decisive, so I guess that rules you out.”

Kakashi let out a hard, surprised laugh. He downed the rest of his beer, and took Iruka by the hand, pulling him out of the bar without a word. 

* * *

“ _Tacos?_ ” Iruka deadpanned, as Kakashi stopped in front of a tiny food cart a block away from the bar.

“Tacos,” Kakashi confirmed, letting go of Iruka’s hand. 

“I thought you were taking me somewhere to have really hot sex,” Iruka half-joked, wanting to reach for Kakashi’s hand again.

“This is better.”

Iruka gawked at him, letting the look on his face convey his disbelief. 

“Just wait,” Kakashi promised, stepping up to the cart to place his order. He moved aside to let Iruka do the same.

Iruka gave him one last side-eye, before turning to the old lady who was waiting on him.

“Eh,  _para mi, dos de carne con cebolla y cilantrillo y nada más._ ”

She gave him a small nod and got to work.

“You speak Spanish,” Kakashi said when they stepped away.

“Do I look white to you?” Iruka teased.

“Well, no…” Kakashi chuckled. It sounded a little nervous. “But I didn’t want to assume.”

“Oh,  _now_ you don’t want to assume?” Iruka smirked, reaching out for the tacos being held in his direction. “It’s okay to peg me as gay, but not Mexican?”

“That’s different and you know it,” Kakashi said. He paid for them both, and grabbed his own plate.

Iruka shifted his stance towards the condiments.

“For the record,” Iruka started, eyeing him playfully. “I’m half Mexican, half Puerto Rican. Mom and Dad, respectively. Did you want some?” he asked, holding out the hot sauce he had drizzled on his tacos a second before.

Kakashi shook his head.

“No, thanks."

“Like a true gringo,” Iruka sarcastically swooned.

“ _Maybe_ — ” Kakashi began, walking off to find a place to sit. “—I don’t like to sully the flavor with heat.”

Iruka stopped in his tracks.

“Sully the—,” he clutched dramatically at his chest with his free hand. “How dare you insult the power of  _pique_.”

Kakashi sat down on a stone bench, sliding to the edge to make room for Iruka.

“Meh,” he shrugged. “I don’t like spicy things.”

“Then it’s a wonder you can handle me,” Iruka said without thinking. When his brain caught up to his mouth though, he was slightly embarrassed.

They sat in silence for a moment, before Kakashi broke it.

“That was  _bad,_ ” Kakashi laughed. 

“…I’ll admit it wasn’t my best,” Iruka said, a new heat on his cheeks. “But no worse then your _‘_ _I’m not alone anymore_ ’ line.” 

“It worked didn’t it?” Kakashi asked. “Unless I’m alone here on this bench…?” 

“You’re about to be,” Iruka threatened.

Kakashi arched a brow at him in challenge. 

“Just...Shut up and eat your damn tacos,” Iruka said, his lips deceiving him with a smile.

Kakashi eyed Iruka’s plate, silently telling him to do the same. They each took a bite at the same time, though Iruka was a little indignant about it.

“So..?” Kakashi prompted him.

Iruka moaned lewdly after he swallowed.

“Fuck you,” Kakashi laughed, pushing him on the shoulder.

Iruka laughed into his napkin as he wiped his mouth.

“It’s really good, actually.”

“Told you.”

“…but if this tastes better than you fuck, maybe I don’t want sleep with you after all.”

“Oh my god.” Kakashi shifted around on the bench, as if he was going to get up. Iruka was immensely satisfied to see his pale cheeks stained pink. “You’re such an ass,” Kakashi mumbled around the bite of taco he was still chewing.

“What was that? I have a great ass?” Iruka teased, causing Kakashi to launch into a coughing fit. “You really shouldn’t talk with your mouth full, Kakashi.”

This time Kakashi really did get up, throwing away his plate in the garbage in the mean time.

“I can’t with you…” he said when he returned, his cheeks hurting from laughing so hard.

Iruka ran his eyes over Kakashi’s body now that it stood before him. He didn’t try to hide the fire in his gaze. The man was _fit._

“Well, thats too bad…” Iruka said, licking his lips, “…because I’m still hungry.”

* * *

30 minutes later found Kakashi with his pants around his ankles and Iruka’s mouth around his cock. 

They had started making out in their Uber, and couldn’t seem to stop. They hadn’t even made it past Kakashi’s front door—his back was slammed into it the minute it shut behind them.

Kakashi leaned his head against the door now, his abdomen starting to tighten. He was  _so_ close, and they’d just started. He didn’t want it to be over yet.

Iruka pulled off, pressing his forehead to Kakashi’s thigh, apparently having the same thought.

“I swear, if you lose it already—,” he laughed.

Kakashi grabbed Iruka by the hair and used the leverage to push his cock past Iruka’s lips again. He grinned down at him.

“You really shouldn’t talk with your mouth full, Iru- _ah!_ ”

Kakashi keeled over as Iruka gave him a harsh suck, his smug retort being robbed from him completely. Iruka flicked Kakashi off with one hand, and gave his bare ass a loud reprimanding slap with the other.

Kakashi pressed a fist to his mouth to stifle a moan, not wanting to give Iruka the satisfaction. When the urge faded, he smiled into his skin—his lips sensitive and swollen from being so thoroughly kissed.  


The hand still entangled in Iruka’s hair loosened, taking on a more tender, caressing touch. He rubbed his thumb across the back of Iruka’s neck, hot and slick with sweat. 

One of Iruka’s hands snaked up his body in response, stopping at his hip. He rubbed his thumb beneath Kakashi’s navel, answering Kakashi’s touch with the same level of tenderness he had received. 

The gesture soothed something deep inside Kakashi. He closed his eyes, and felt an unexpected weight lift from his chest.

Yeah.

He was definitely going to fall in love.

**Author's Note:**

> ... do you think Kakashi was being serious in his dating profile? 
> 
> (๑¯◡¯๑)
> 
> I don’t know if I took the team name too seriously, but I really amped up the sass here hahah XD thanks for reading!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Overthinking It](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23492719) by [Gloomier](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloomier/pseuds/Gloomier)




End file.
